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From: Joseph Abraham V Bibal
Category: Philosophy of Love
Date: 09 Jun 2001
Love is rooted in character and in one's person: Love is a given or natural capacity in the heart of every person. Yet it can grow only when it is first nurtured by parents or those who took the role of parenting and then later when it is deliberately choosen by the person. love is therefore a power and a choice. True love is given but it is simultaneously received as it is given. A love that is not experienced by the giver is difficult to understand or even appreciate. Without the recognition and the feeling it will be impossible to sustain the behavior or the habit. True love is rooted in character. It is not a momentary feeling or just one special choice delivered because of a special person and a special situation. Love that is rooted in character means instead that "I AM LOVE." This means ultimately that all that I am - from waking to sleeping, from breating to resting, from thinking to feeling- is really love itself. Love is not simply something that I do, feel, think, desire, seek, even suffer, endure, carry, recall, but WHO I AM. The person who is entirely focused on the other and denies his or her personal growth and happiness will ultimately feel drained and dry later on. The person who loves is already loving himself or herself as well. He or she already experiences the love given away. It is only in this that LOVING WILL ALWAYS BE WINNING. It is a progressive gaining and developing of oneself and everyone and everything around us. The more I love the more I become; the less love I give, I become less of me. The greatest challenge is to love those who cannot or does not love us in return. Most people will think of this as a loss and a waste but really not. It is a loss only for those who expect to be loved first. The true path is to love first and last. This is the real meaning of unconditional love. How do love those who cannot love us in return? We can love them in secret. Pray for them, appreciate them, inspire them or give them what is necessary for their growth. Painful because we can't be loved in return but nurturing. We focus in our person and in their person, not on the hurting feelings. When they do us harm, then this is more reason to choose to love them, to do what is good because it is good.